The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes...
Jan. 6th, 2010 12:57 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
starvinbohemianI'm sorry if you're feeling spammed by my Sherlock Holmes posts, but you're just going to have to wait me out until I burn out on this obsession as I've burned through the rest. I predict a month at most. But for the time being...
Have a snippet from Billy Wilder's 1970 film, The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes. Wilder thankfully did not have to contend with Andrea Plunket over this one, because there's no way in hell Plunket would have allowed it. Robert Stephens, also known as the former Mr. Maggie Smith, plays a very effeminate and sexually ambiguous Holmes. In other words, he plays a fantastic Holmes! And he makes Robert Downey Jr.'s Holmes look very butch by comparison.
At the beginning of the film, Watson drags Holmes to the ballet, where he is propositioned by a Russian ballet dancer to father her child.
Russian interpreter: You find her attractive or no?
Holmes: Well, I, uh...
*Watson bursts into the dressing room from where he has been flirting with ballerinas*
Watson: Uh, excuse me, what does 'prokyzhynik' mean?
Russian interpreter: It means 'you little devil.'
Watson: It does? I am? Thank you! *Leaves to play with Russian ballerinas*
Russian interpreter: I repeat question. You find Madame attractive or no?
Holmes: Oh, I find her most attractive... for a woman, that is.
Russian Interpreter: Then no problem!
Holmes: Maybe a slight one. You see, I am not a free man.
Russian interpreter: Not free? But you are a bachelor.
Holmes: A bachelor living with another bachelor... for the last five years. *Pause* Five very happy years.
Russian interpreter: What is it you are trying to tell us?
Holmes: Well, I hoped I could avoid the subject... but some of us, through a cruel caprice of Mother Nature...
Russian interpreter: Get to point!
Holmes: The point is that Tchaikovsky is not an isolated case.
Russian interpreter: You mean you and Dr. Watson...?
Holmes: *Nods*
Russian interpreter: He... is your glass of tea?
Holmes: If you want to be picturesque about it.
Then follows an adorable scene where a group of gay ballerina men, having heard of Watson and Holmes's supposed relationship, attempt to adopt Watson, much to his confusion.
Russian interpreter (to Watson): Perhaps it is unusual for a doctor and a detective. But in ballet, it is usual.
Following this scene is a very sad scene wherein Watson freaks out at Holmes for telling people they're gay, damaging his reputation, and potentially ruining his life. He fears being shunned by his old army regiment and never again being able to show his face in "polite society" for fear of "malicious whispers." He goes on a tirade on how he and Holmes will have to get married-- "Then they'll really talk!" Holmes quips-- and stop living together.
While Holmes was lying about the state of his relationship with Watson to get out of fathering the persistent ballerina's child, it becomes clear that Watson's panicked tirade hurts his feelings. Which culminates in...
Watson: Holmes, let me ask you a question. I hope I'm not being presumptuous... There have been women in your life, haven't there?
Holmes (sadly): The answer is yes. You are being presumptuous. Goodnight, Watson. *He leaves*
In addition to the above scenes, there is an emotionally devastating deleted section provided on the DVD. Holmes's cocaine addiction has a big presence in this film (yay!), and Watson is constantly after Holmes to quit the habit. In the deleted section, Watson goes so far as to threaten to move out of their shared flat as well as Holmes's life-- which is very reminiscent of the Guy Ritchie film-- if Holmes doesn't quit. Holmes calls his bluff, so Watson gives him three vials of cocaine and essentially tells him to have a nice life. While Watson is packing, he hears Holmes shooting off his gun in the next room. Terrified, he races into the next room only to discover that Holmes has apparently shot the cocaine vials. Watson is delighted and relieved. He thanks Holmes for choosing him over the cocaine.
Watson: For a minute there, I thought you were actually going to let me go!
Holmes: Don't be silly. I would do anything to keep you here.
This would be a darling interlude except for the fact that Holmes actually switched out the cocaine in the vials he shot with something else. He hid the cocaine away in his violin case. A devastating scene for both Watson (if he knew) and for Holmes's habit. If I felt brave enough to write Holmes fic, then this is a scene I would want to delve deeper into if only to see poor Watson's reaction when he found out. Devastating because Holmes would do anything, including lying and creating a ruse, to keep Watson-- anything except give up cocaine, that is.
There is another deleted subplot where Watson fakes a case for Holmes with the sole intent of keeping him distracted long enough to keep him off the needle for a while longer. Being a bumbler, he, of course, fails. *Sigh* Oh, Watson.
The last scene of the movie is also devastating. Having suffered a personal loss, Holmes asks Watson where he's hidden the cocaine this time. At a complete loss for how else to help him, Watson tells him. The last shot is of Holmes disappearing into his room with the cocaine. Cheerful, I know.
Lastly, a quick disclaimer. The above bits are very slashy in isolation, but I doubt anyone who has seen it would come out slashing this Holmes and Watson. Why? In short, Watson. Colin Blakely's Watson is not Jude Law's Watson. Remember, no other Watson is Jude Law's Watson. Blakely's Watson is of the ridiculous bumbler!Watson breed, and he is also a ridiculous (in practice) womanizer. The movie reflects on Holmes's complicated sexuality and not Watson's. And despite the above bits, I think it would also be a stretch to say that Holmes is into Watson. Though, there is another scene at the beginning when they are at the ballet, and a bored Holmes watches Watson's enraptured reaction rather than the actual ballet. Yes, a stretch, but we're slashers and that's kinda what we do, yes?
Have a snippet from Billy Wilder's 1970 film, The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes. Wilder thankfully did not have to contend with Andrea Plunket over this one, because there's no way in hell Plunket would have allowed it. Robert Stephens, also known as the former Mr. Maggie Smith, plays a very effeminate and sexually ambiguous Holmes. In other words, he plays a fantastic Holmes! And he makes Robert Downey Jr.'s Holmes look very butch by comparison.
At the beginning of the film, Watson drags Holmes to the ballet, where he is propositioned by a Russian ballet dancer to father her child.
Russian interpreter: You find her attractive or no?
Holmes: Well, I, uh...
*Watson bursts into the dressing room from where he has been flirting with ballerinas*
Watson: Uh, excuse me, what does 'prokyzhynik' mean?
Russian interpreter: It means 'you little devil.'
Watson: It does? I am? Thank you! *Leaves to play with Russian ballerinas*
Russian interpreter: I repeat question. You find Madame attractive or no?
Holmes: Oh, I find her most attractive... for a woman, that is.
Russian Interpreter: Then no problem!
Holmes: Maybe a slight one. You see, I am not a free man.
Russian interpreter: Not free? But you are a bachelor.
Holmes: A bachelor living with another bachelor... for the last five years. *Pause* Five very happy years.
Russian interpreter: What is it you are trying to tell us?
Holmes: Well, I hoped I could avoid the subject... but some of us, through a cruel caprice of Mother Nature...
Russian interpreter: Get to point!
Holmes: The point is that Tchaikovsky is not an isolated case.
Russian interpreter: You mean you and Dr. Watson...?
Holmes: *Nods*
Russian interpreter: He... is your glass of tea?
Holmes: If you want to be picturesque about it.
Then follows an adorable scene where a group of gay ballerina men, having heard of Watson and Holmes's supposed relationship, attempt to adopt Watson, much to his confusion.
Russian interpreter (to Watson): Perhaps it is unusual for a doctor and a detective. But in ballet, it is usual.
Following this scene is a very sad scene wherein Watson freaks out at Holmes for telling people they're gay, damaging his reputation, and potentially ruining his life. He fears being shunned by his old army regiment and never again being able to show his face in "polite society" for fear of "malicious whispers." He goes on a tirade on how he and Holmes will have to get married-- "Then they'll really talk!" Holmes quips-- and stop living together.
While Holmes was lying about the state of his relationship with Watson to get out of fathering the persistent ballerina's child, it becomes clear that Watson's panicked tirade hurts his feelings. Which culminates in...
Watson: Holmes, let me ask you a question. I hope I'm not being presumptuous... There have been women in your life, haven't there?
Holmes (sadly): The answer is yes. You are being presumptuous. Goodnight, Watson. *He leaves*
In addition to the above scenes, there is an emotionally devastating deleted section provided on the DVD. Holmes's cocaine addiction has a big presence in this film (yay!), and Watson is constantly after Holmes to quit the habit. In the deleted section, Watson goes so far as to threaten to move out of their shared flat as well as Holmes's life-- which is very reminiscent of the Guy Ritchie film-- if Holmes doesn't quit. Holmes calls his bluff, so Watson gives him three vials of cocaine and essentially tells him to have a nice life. While Watson is packing, he hears Holmes shooting off his gun in the next room. Terrified, he races into the next room only to discover that Holmes has apparently shot the cocaine vials. Watson is delighted and relieved. He thanks Holmes for choosing him over the cocaine.
Watson: For a minute there, I thought you were actually going to let me go!
Holmes: Don't be silly. I would do anything to keep you here.
This would be a darling interlude except for the fact that Holmes actually switched out the cocaine in the vials he shot with something else. He hid the cocaine away in his violin case. A devastating scene for both Watson (if he knew) and for Holmes's habit. If I felt brave enough to write Holmes fic, then this is a scene I would want to delve deeper into if only to see poor Watson's reaction when he found out. Devastating because Holmes would do anything, including lying and creating a ruse, to keep Watson-- anything except give up cocaine, that is.
There is another deleted subplot where Watson fakes a case for Holmes with the sole intent of keeping him distracted long enough to keep him off the needle for a while longer. Being a bumbler, he, of course, fails. *Sigh* Oh, Watson.
The last scene of the movie is also devastating. Having suffered a personal loss, Holmes asks Watson where he's hidden the cocaine this time. At a complete loss for how else to help him, Watson tells him. The last shot is of Holmes disappearing into his room with the cocaine. Cheerful, I know.
Lastly, a quick disclaimer. The above bits are very slashy in isolation, but I doubt anyone who has seen it would come out slashing this Holmes and Watson. Why? In short, Watson. Colin Blakely's Watson is not Jude Law's Watson. Remember, no other Watson is Jude Law's Watson. Blakely's Watson is of the ridiculous bumbler!Watson breed, and he is also a ridiculous (in practice) womanizer. The movie reflects on Holmes's complicated sexuality and not Watson's. And despite the above bits, I think it would also be a stretch to say that Holmes is into Watson. Though, there is another scene at the beginning when they are at the ballet, and a bored Holmes watches Watson's enraptured reaction rather than the actual ballet. Yes, a stretch, but we're slashers and that's kinda what we do, yes?
